Archive for October, 2006

British scientists grow human liver in a laboratory

October 31, 2006

By FIONA MacRAE, Science Reporter
 
Read entire article here
 
Dr Nico Forraz   and Prof Colin McGuckin, the tissue created in the lab is actually the size of a 1p piece
British scientists have grown the world’s first artificial liver from stem cells in a breakthrough that will one day provide entire organs for transplant.

The technique that created the ‘mini-liver’, currently the size of a one pence piece, will be developed to create a full-size functioning liver.

Described as a ‘Eureka moment’ by the Newcastle University researchers, the tissue was created from blood taken from babies’ umbilical cords just a few minutes after birth.

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GAO Chief Warns Economic Disaster Looms

October 29, 2006

Read entire article here

What they don’t talk about is a dirty little secret everyone in Washington knows, or at least should. The vast majority of economists and budget analysts agree: The ship of state is on a disastrous course, and will founder on the reefs of economic disaster if nothing is done to correct it.

If the United States government conducts business as usual over the next few decades, a national debt that is already $8.5 trillion could reach $46 trillion or more, adjusted for inflation. That’s almost as much as the total net worth of every person in America – Bill Gates, Warren Buffett and those Google guys included.

A hole that big could paralyze the U.S. economy; according to some projections, just the interest payments on a debt that big would be as much as all the taxes the government collects today.

And every year that nothing is done about it, Walker says, the problem grows by $2 trillion to $3 trillion.

Some Quickies

October 28, 2006

Quickie #1
One day, Jay Dini came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in
a very sexy nightie.
“Tie me up,” she purred, “and you can do anything you want.”

So he tied her up and went fishing.

Quickie #2
A woman came home, screeching! her car into the driveway, and ran
into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her
lungs, “Honey, pack your bags. I won the damn lottery!”

The husband said, “Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or
mountain stuff?”

“Doesn’t matter,” she said. “Just get the hell out.”

Quickie #3
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and
the other is a husband.

Quickie #4
A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver’s license.
First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician
showed him a card with the letters: ‘C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.’

“Can you read this?” the optician asked.

“Read it?” the Polish guy replied, “I know the guy.”

Quickie #5
Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, “I
must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the
convent.”

“Thank God,” said an elderly nun at the back. “I’m so tired of
chardonnay.”

Quickie #6
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

“Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM
NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get
MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK!

Careful…CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when
you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY?
Have you LOST your mind?

Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt
them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!”

The wife stared at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? You
think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?”

The husband calmly replied, “I wanted to show you what it feels
like when I’m driving.”

Quickie #7
Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolinamountain man,
was drafted by the Army.

On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb.
That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair.

On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That
afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth.

On the third day, the Army issued him a jock strap. The Army has
been looking for Herman for 51 years

New E-Mail Virus

October 28, 2006

I thought you would want to know about this e-mail virus.  Even the most
advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one.

It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1965.

Symptoms:

1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice.  (Done that!)

2. Causes you to send a blank e-mail!  (Done that too!)

3. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person.  (Yep!)

4. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you.  (Who
me?)

5. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment.  (Well, darn!)

6. Causes you to hit “SEND” before you’ve finished.  (Oh no! – not
again!)

7. Causes you to hit “DELETE” instead of “SEND.”  (And I just hate
that!)

8. Causes you to hit “SEND” when you should “DELETE.”  (Oh, no!)

IT IS CALLED THE “C-NILE VIRUS.”

The top ten signs that your co-worker is a computer hacker

October 28, 2006

 10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was $20,000.

9. He’s won the Publisher’s Clearing House sweepstakes three years running.

8. When asked for his phone number, he gives it in hex.

7. Seems strangely calm whenever the office LAN goes down.

6. Somehow he/she gets HBO on his PC at work.

5. Mumbled, “Oh, puh-leeez” 95 times during the movie “The Net”

4. Massive RRSP contribution made in half-cent increments.

3. Video dating profile lists “public-key encryption” among turn-ons

2. When his computer starts up, you hear, “Good Morning, Mr. President.”

1. You hear him murmur, “Let’s see you use that Visa card now, jerk.”

Good Catholic

October 28, 2006

Eino, a Finnlander from Cook County in northern Minnesota, was an older,
single gentleman who was born and raised a Lutheran.

Each Friday night after work, he would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a
venison steak.

Now, all of Eino’s neighbors were Catholic…and since it was Lent, they
were forbidden from eating meat on Fridays. The delicious aroma from the
grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful
that they finally talked to their priest.

The priest came to visit Eino, and suggested that Eino convert to
Catholicism. After several classes and much study, Eino attended Mass…and
as the priest sprinkled holy water over Eino, he said, “You were born a
Lutheran and raised a Lutheran, but now you are Catholic.”

Eino’s neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the
wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood.

The priest was called immediately by the neighbors and, as he rushed into
Eino’s yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold Eino, he stopped in
amazement and watched…There stood Eino, clutching a small bottle of water
which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat, and chanted: “You were
born a deer and raised a deer, but now you are a walleye.

What My Mother Taught Me:

October 28, 2006

 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside — I just finished
cleaning!”

2. My mother taught me RELIGION:
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of
next week!”

4. My mother taught me LOGIC:
“Because I said so, that’s why!”

5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
“Be sure you wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident.”

6. My mother taught me IRONY:
“Keep laughing and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

7. My mother taught me about OSMOSIS:
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper!”

8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
“Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!”

9. My mother taught me about STAMINA:
“You’ll sit there ’til all that spinach is finished.”

10. My mother taught me about WEATHER:
“It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.”

11. My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
“If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen
then?”

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
“If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times — don’t
exaggerate!!!”

13. My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
“Stop acting like your father!”

15. My mother taught me about ENVY:
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t
have wonderful parents like you do!”

NINETEEN THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME 50 YEARS TO LEARN

October 28, 2006

NINETEEN THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME 50 YEARS TO LEARN

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative
on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race
has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word
would be “meetings.”

3. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never
want you to share yours with them.

5. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its
glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His
messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.

6. You should not confuse your career with your life.

7. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too
seriously.

8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one
individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very
often, that individual is crazy.

9. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.

10. Never lick a steak knife.

11. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.

12. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

13. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling
reason why we observe daylight savings time.

14. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely
suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby
emerging from her at that moment.

15. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to
make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

16. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age,
gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down
inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

17. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to
annoy people who are not in them.

18. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice
person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

19. Your friends love you anyway.

Saudi Arabia confirms threat to oil facilities

October 28, 2006

Saudi Arabia confirms threat to oil facilities

Read entire article here

Fri Oct 27, 2006 11:19am ET
RIYADH (Reuters) – Top world oil exporter Saudi Arabia said on Friday it was taking measures to protect its oil and economic installations from a “terrorist threat”.

Western naval forces in the Gulf have been deployed to counter a possible seaborne threat to its Ras Tanura oil terminal.

“The terrorist threat to the kingdom’s economic installation exists and it is a declared goal of the straying faction to affect the interests of the Saudi citizen,” an Interior Ministry spokesman said.

“Saudi security forces are cooperating and coordinating with the Saudi navy to take the necessary security measures,” he told Reuters.
 
© Reuters 2006. All Rights Reserved

Transgender men free to use ALL of MTA’s Bathrooms

October 25, 2006

Transgender men free to use ALL of MTA’s Bathrooms
 
BY PETE DONOHUE
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
 
 Read entire article here

Helena Stone, formerly Henry McGuinness, stands her ground yesterday outside Grand Central Terminal’s ladies’ room, which can now be used by transgender men. 
 
The line for the girls’ room just got longer.
Men who live as women can now legally use women’s rest rooms in New York’s transit system under an unprecedented deal revealed yesterday.

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority agreed to allow riders to use MTA rest rooms “consistent with their gender expression,” the Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund announced yesterday.

YOU WORRY ME!

October 24, 2006

YOU WORRY ME!

By American Airlines Pilot – Captain John Maniscalco

“I’ve been trying to say this since 9-11 but you worry me. I wish you didn’t. I wish when I walked down the streets of this country that I love, that your color and culture still blended with the beautiful human landscape we enjoy in this country. But you don’t blend in anymore. I notice you, and it worries me, I notice you because I can’t help it anymore. People from your homelands, professing to be Muslims, have been attacking and killing my fellow citizens and our friends for more than 20 years now. I don’t fully understand their grievances and hate but I know that nothing can justify the inhumanity of their attacks.

On September 11, nineteen ARAB-MUSLIMS hijacked four jetliners in my country. They cut the throats of women in front of children and brutally stabbed to death others. They took control of those planes and crashed them into buildings killing thousands of proud fathers, loving sons, wise grandparents, elegant daughters, best friends, favorite coaches, fearless public servants, and children’s mothers.

The Palestinians Celebrated, The Iraqis were overjoyed as was most of the Arab world.

So I notice you now. I don’t want to be worried. I don’t want to be consumed by the same rage and hate and prejudice that has destroyed the soul of these terrorists. But I need your help. As a rational American, trying to protect my country and family in an irrational and unsafe world, I must know how to tell the difference between you, and the Arab/Muslim terrorist.

How do I differentiate between the true Arab/Muslim-Americans and the Arab/Muslims in our communities who are attending our schools, enjoying our parks, and living in OUR communities under the protection of OUR constitution, while they plot the next attack that will slaughter these same good neighbors and children? The events of September 11th changed the answer. It is not my responsibility to determine which of you embraces our great country, with ALL of its religions, with ALL of its different citizens, with all of its faults. It is time for every Arab/Muslim in this country to determine it for me.

I want to know, I demand to know, and I have a right to know whether or not you love America . Do you pledge allegiance to its flag? Do you proudly display it in front of your house, or on your car?

Do you pray in your many daily prayers that Allah will bless this nation, that He will protect and prosper it? Or do you pray that Allah with destroy it in one of your “Jihads”? Are you thankful for the freedom that only this nation affords? A freedom that was paid for by the blood of hundreds of thousands of patriots who gave their lives for this country? Are you willing to preserve this freedom by paying the ultimate sacrifice? Do you love America ? If this is your commitment, then I need YOU to start letting ME know about it.

Your Muslim leaders in this nation should be flooding the media at this time with hard facts on your faith, and what hard actions you are taking as a community and as a religion to protect the United States of America

Please, no more benign overtures of regret for the death of the innocent because I worry about who you regard as innocent. No more benign overtures of condemnation for the unprovoked attacks because I worry about what is unprovoked to you. I am not interested in any more sympathy… I am only interested in action.

What will you do for America – our great country — at this time of crisis, at this time of war?

I want to see Arab-Muslims waving the AMERICAN flag in the streets.

I want to hear you chanting “Allah Bless America”

I want to see young Arab/Muslim men enlisting in the military.

I want to see a commitment of money, time, and emotion to the victims of this butchering and to this nation as a whole.

The FBI has a list of over 400 people they want to talk to regarding the WTC attack.

Many of these people live and socialize in Muslim communities.

You know them.  You know where they are.

Hand them over to us, now!

But I have seen little even approaching this sort of action. Instead I have seen an already closed and secretive community close even tighter. You have disappeared from the streets. You have posted armed security guards at your facilities. You have threatened lawsuits. You have screamed for protection from reprisals.

The very few Arab/Muslim representatives that HAVE appeared in the media were defensive and equivocating. They seemed more concerned with making sure that the United States proves who was responsible before taking action. They seemed more concerned with protecting their fellow Muslims from violence directed towards them in the UnitedStates and abroad than they did with supporting our country and denouncing “leaders” like Khadafi, Hussein, Farrakhan, and Arafat.

If the true teachings of Islam proclaim tolerance and peace and love for all people then I want chapter and verse from the Koran and statements from popular Muslim leaders to back it up. What good is it if the teachings in the Koran are good and pure and true when your “leaders” are teaching fanatical interpretations, terrorism, and

It matters little how good Islam SHOULD BE if large numbers of the world’s Muslims interpret the teachings of Mohammed incorrectly and adhere to a degenerative form of the religion. A form that has been demonstrated to us over and over again. A form whose structure is built upon a foundation of violence, death, and suicide. A form whose members are recruited from the prisons around the world. A form whose members (some as young as five years old) are seen day after day, week in and week out, year after year, marching in the streets around the world, burning effigies of our presidents, burning the American flag, shooting weapons into the air. A form whose members convert from a peaceful religion, only to take up arms against the great United States of America, the country of their birth. A form whose rules are so twisted, that their traveling members refuse to show their faces at airport security checkpoints, in the name of Islam.

Do you and your fellow Muslims hate us because our women proudly show their faces in public rather than cover up like a shameful whore?

Do you and your fellow Muslims hate us because we drink wine with dinner, or celebrate Christmas?

Do you and you fellow Muslims hate us because we have befriended Israel , the ONLY FRIENDLY CIVILIZED SOCIETY in the Muslim/Arab area, that thinks and acts like most Americans.

And if you and your fellow Muslims hate us, then why in the world are you even here?

Are you here to take our money?

Are you here to undermine our peace and stability?

Are you here to destroy us?

If so, I want you to leave. I want you to go back to your desert sandpit where women are treated like rats and dogs. I want you to take your religion, your friends, and your family back to your Islamic extremists, and STAY THERE!

We will NEVER give in to your influence, your retarded mentality, your twisted, violent, intolerant religion.

We will NEVER allow the attacks of September 11, or any others for that matter, to take away that which is so precious to us: Our rights under the greatest constitution in the world.

I want to know where every Arab/ Muslim in this country stands and I think it is my right and the right of every true citizen of this country to demand it. A right paid for by the blood of thousands of my brothers and sisters who died protecting the very constitution that is protecting you and your family. I am pleading with you to et me know. I want you here as my brother, my neighbor, my friend, as a fellow American.

But there can be no gray areas or ambivalence regarding your allegiance

and it is up to YOU, to show ME, where YOU stand.”

“Until then .. you worry me”

Scalia Rips Judges on Abortion, Suicide

October 24, 2006

Oct 21, 8:02 PM EDT

Scalia Rips Judges on Abortion, Suicide

By JOHN HEILPRIN
Associated Press Writer

Read entire article here
Scalia, a leading conservative voice after 20 years on the court, said people naturally get upset with the growing number of cases in which a federal court intrudes on social issues better handled by the political process.

“Take the abortion issue,” he said. “Whichever side wins, in the courts, the other side feels cheated. I mean, you know, there’s something to be said for both sides.”

“The court could have said, ‘No, thank you.’ The court have said, you know, ‘There is nothing in the Constitution on the abortion issue for either side,'” Scalia said. “It could have said the same thing about suicide, it could have said the same thing about … you know, all the social issues the courts are now taking.”

Scalia said courts didn’t use to decide social issues like that.

 “It is part of the new philosophy of the Constitution,” he said. “And when you push the courts into that, and when they leap into it, they make themselves politically controversial. And that’s what places their independence at risk.”

Justice Samuel Alito Jr., the newest member of the Supreme Court, agreed that “the same thing exists, but to a lesser degree, with the lower courts.”

Scalia expressed disdain for the news media and the general reading public and suggested that together they condone inaccurate portrayals of federal judges and courts.

“The press is never going to report judicial opinions accurately,” he said.

“They’re just going to report, who is the plaintiff? Was that a nice little old lady? And who is the defendant? Was this, you know, some scuzzy guy? And who won? Was it the good guy that won or the bad guy? And that’s all you’re going to get in a press report, and you can’t blame them, you can’t blame them. Because nobody would read it if you went into the details of the law that the court has to resolve. So you can’t judge your judges on the basis of what you read in the press.”

Alito complained that people understand the courts through a news media that typically oversimplifies and sensationalizes. He said people’s ability to amplify their comments globally about judges and their opinions on the Internet takes a toll on the judiciary.

“This is not just like somebody handing out a leaflet in the past, where a small number of people can see this,” he said. “This is available to the world. … It changes what it means to be a judge. It certainly changes the attractiveness of a judicial career.”

Scalia chimed in: “I think what Justice Alito says about being careful about, you know … be nice to your judge. Take a judge to lunch. No, you can’t do that.”

Later, Scalia observed, “It so happens that everything that is stupid is not unconstitutional.”

End the War in Iraq Act

October 22, 2006

End the War in Iraq Act (McGovern, D-MA)—H.R. 4232.  Defunds the War in Iraq, forcing immediate troop withdrawal.
The Democrats also have big plans for U.S. foreign policy. Rep. James McGovern, D-Mass., represents his party with the End the War in Iraq Act. Otherwise known as the “Admit Defeat, Place Tail Between Legs and Scurry Home Act,” the bill would completely defund the U.S. military in Iraq, forcing an immediate withdrawal of all troops. So simple yet so profound – why couldn’t the Republicans think of that?

THEY WALK AMONG US

October 22, 2006
 

Do you know these people??
 
  Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he  put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: “Free to good  home. You want it, you take it.” For three days the fridge sat  there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that  people were too untrusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true,
  so he changed the sign to read: “Fridge for sale $50.” The next day  someone stole it.
 
  Caution… They Walk Among Us
 
  While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate  agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun  waking him up every morning. She asked, “Does the sun rise in the  north?” When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and  has for sometime, she shook her head and said, “Oh, I don’t keep up with  that stuff.”
 
  They Walk Among Us!
 
  I used to work in technical support for a 24/7-call  center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call  center was open. I told him, “The number you dialed is open 24  hours a day, 7 days a week.” He responded, “Is that Eastern  or Pacific time?” Wanting to end the call quickly, I said,  “Uh, Pacific”. .
 
  They Walk Among Us!
 
  My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria,  when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the  sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a  convertible, but “didn’t think she’d get sunburned because the car was  moving”. .
 
  They Walk Among Us!
 
  My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it’s designed  to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk…
 
  They Walk Among Us!

  My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were  discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2        cases. The cashier  multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount….
 
  They Walk Among Us!
 
  I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a  nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, “Wouldn’t  the chain rip out every time she turned her head?” I explained that a  person ‘s nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the  head is turned…
 
  They Walk Among Us!
 
  I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So  I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never  showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a  trained professional and I was in good hands. “Now,” she asked me,  “has your plane arrived yet?”…
 
  They Walk Among Us!
 
  While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering  a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he  would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time  before responding. “Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m  hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.
 
  Yep, They walk among us, too.

BRAVE NEW SCHOOLS

October 20, 2006

BRAVE NEW SCHOOLS
Terror suspect contributed
to school ‘religion guidelines’
Issued by Clinton, rules let students
pray to Allah, but banish Christmas

Read entire article here
 
Posted: October 19, 2006
1:00 a.m. Eastern
 
By Bob Unruh
© 2006 WorldNetDaily.com

A man arrested as a terror suspect for allegedly trying to transport $340,000 from a group tied to Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi, and who reputedly had connections to Osama bin Laden, helped write the “Religious Expression in Public Schools” guidelines issued by President Clinton during his tenure in office.

SKorean scientists say cancer-killing virus developed

October 19, 2006

SKorean scientists say cancer-killing virus developed
Oct 19 6:21 AM US/Eastern

Read entire article here

  
South Korean scientists have said they have developed a new genetically altered strain of virus which is highly efficient in targeting and killing cancer cells.
The new therapy developed by the team from Yonsei University uses a genetically-engineered form of the adenovirus, which normally causes colds.

The adenovirus was implanted with a human gene that is related to the production of relaxin, a hormone associated with pregnancy.

When injected into cancerous tumors, the virus quickly multiplies in the cancer cells and kills them, the team said.

The new adenovirus can target only cancer cells and does not harm normal cells, the team said.

Existing viral treatments fail to kill off all the cancerous cells.

“I believe we have found a way to overcome one of the great obstacles to finding a genetically altered viral cure for cancer,” Yun Chae-Ok, one of the researchers, told AFP on Thursday.

Following three rounds of injections, more than 90 percent of cancer cells in the brains, liver, lungs and womb of mice disappeared within 60 days, the team said.

Clinical tests will be carried out early next year and last 18 months, Yun said.

The research results were published in the October 18 edition of the prestigious bimonthly Journal of the National Cancer Institute in the United States.

MICHIGAN HUMOR—

October 19, 2006

MICHIGAN HUMOR—

 If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18
inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim
by, you might live in  Michigan .

If you’re proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights
each year because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might
live in Michigan .

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Michigan .

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Michigan .

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don’t work there, you might live in Michigan .

If your dad’s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Michigan .

If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might live in Michigan .

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Michigan .

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Michigan

Part 2 – You know you’re a true MICHIGANIAN when………….

1. “Vacation” means going up north on I- 75.

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

4. You often switch from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day.

5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings).

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.

9. You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter b ecause the potholes are filled with snow.

11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

15. Down South to you means Ohio

16. A brat is something you eat.

17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole barn.

18. You go out to fish fry every Friday

19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

21 You find 0 degrees “a little chilly.”

22. You drink pop and bake with soda.

23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it’s not medicine.

24. You know what a Yooper is.

25. You think owning a Honda is Un American.

26. You know that UP is a place, not a direction

27. You know it’s possible to live in a thumb.

28. You understand that when visiting Detroit , the best thing to wear is a Kevlar vest.

29. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Michigan friends.

Saving American Lives

October 18, 2006

Dear Americans,

Yesterday morning marked a significant victory in the War on Terror. President Bush signed vital legislation ensuring that America can continue interrogating dangerous terrorists like 9/11 mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammed. Under this new law, the brutal terrorists who planned the attack on our country can be brought to justice. This law is an important reminder of what we can accomplish when the President and Congress work together for the safety of America.

There is nothing more important than protecting the American people and ensuring that we have the intelligence we need to stop attacks on our homeland. The vast majority of Democrats in Congress did not agree. Shockingly, 84% of the Democrats in the House voted against interrogating terrorists, as did 73% of the Democrats in the Senate. The Democrats who voted against this bill out of concern for terrorist civil liberties include all of their key leaders in Congress: would-be Speaker Nancy Pelosi, House Majority Leader-in waiting John Murtha, and Senate Democrat leader Harry Reid. Would the Military Commissions Act have ever seen the light of day in a Democrat-led Congress? The law signed yesterday continues a vital program that has played a prominent role in questioning every senior al-Qaeda leader now in our custody. Republicans in Congress worked to successfully extend this program, and Democrats overwhelmingly voted “No.” That’s a very clear difference.

In the next 20 days, I hope you will take a stand for a stronger America by doing everything possible to ensure that these Democrats aren’t given even more power in Washington

The stakes are simply too high. Yesterday’s victory shows why we need leaders who will make the responsible choices for our nation’s security .

Sincerely,

Ken Mehlman
Chairman, Republican National Committee

Reid to Reimburse Campaign for Donations

October 18, 2006

Reid to Reimburse Campaign for Donations
Oct 16 5:08 PM US/Eastern
  
By JOHN SOLOMON
Associated Press Writer

WASHINGTON
Read entire article here
 
 Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid has been using campaign donations instead of his personal money to pay Christmas bonuses for the support staff at the Ritz-Carlton where he lives in an upscale condominium. Federal election law bars candidates from converting political donations for personal use.
Questioned about the campaign expenditures by The Associated Press, Reid’s office said Monday he was personally reimbursing his campaign for $3,300 in donations he had directed to the staff holiday fund at his residence.

Reid also announced he was amending his ethics reports to Congress to more fully account for a Las Vegas land deal, highlighted in an AP story last week, that allowed him to collect $1.1 million in 2004 for property he hadn’t personally owned in three years.

In that matter, the senator hadn’t disclosed to Congress that he first sold land to a friend’s limited liability company back in 2001 and took an ownership stake in the company. He collected the seven-figure payout when the company sold the land again in 2004 to others.

Reid portrayed the 2004 sale as a personal sale of land, making no mention of the company’s ownership or its role in the sale.

Reid said his amended ethics reports would list the 2001 sale and the company, called Patrick Lane LLC. He said the amended reports would also divulge two other smaller land deals he had failed to report to Congress.

“I directed my staff to file amended financial disclosure forms noting that in 2001, I transferred title to the land to a Limited Liability Corporation,” Reid said in a statement issued by his office.

He said he believed the 2001 sale did not alter his ownership of the land but that he agreed to file the amended reports because “I believe in ensuring all facts come to light.”

Reid labeled the AP story as the “latest attempt” by Republicans to affect the election. AP reported last week that it learned of the land deal from a former Reid adviser who had concerns about the way the deal was reported to Congress.

On the Ritz-Carlton holiday donations, Reid gave $600 in 2002, then $1,200 in 2004 and $1,500 in 2005 from his re-election campaign to an entity listed as the REC Employee Holiday Fund. His campaign listed the expenses as campaign “salary” for two of the years and as a “contribution” one year.

Reid’s office said the listing as salary was a “clerical error.”

Residents and workers at the Ritz said the fund’s full name is the Residents Executive Committee Holiday Fund and that it collects money each year from the condominium residents to help provide Christmas gifts, bonuses and a party for the support staff.

Federal election law permits campaigns to provide “gifts of nominal value” but prohibits candidates from using political donations for personal expenses, such as mortgage, rent or utilities for “any part of any personal residence.”

The law specifically defines prohibited personal use expenses as any “obligation or expense of any person that would exist irrespective of the candidate’s campaign or duties as a federal officeholder.”

Land deeds show Reid and his wife, Landra, purchased a condominium for their Washington residence at the hotel for $750,000 in March 2001. The holiday fund has existed for years the at the condo, workers said.

Reid said Monday he believed the expenses were permissible but he nonetheless was reimbursing the campaign.

“These donations were made to thank the men and women who work in the building for the extra work they do as a result of my political activities, and for helping the security officers assigned to me because of my Senate position,” Reid said.

Larry Noble, the Federal Election Commission’s former chief enforcement lawyer, said Reid’s explanation is aimed at a “gray area” in the law by suggesting the donations were tied to his official Senate and political work.

“What makes this harder for the senator is that this is his personal residence and this looks like an event that everybody else at the residence is taking out of their personal money as they’re living there,” Noble said.

On the land dealings, Reid announced Monday he had failed to disclose two other transactions on his prior ethics reports and would account for those on his amended reports along with the 2001 sale.

The first, he said, involved the sale in 2004 of about one-third acre of land in 2004 he owned in his hometown of Searchlight, Nev. And, he said he had not reported his ownership since 1985 of a quarter acre of land his brother gave him in 1985.

Reid said the failure to disclose those transactions previously was due to “clerical errors” and they amounted to “two minor matters that were inadvertently left off my original disclosure forms.”

He had asked the Senate Ethics Committee last Wednesday for an opinion on the 2001 land sale but decided to amend his forms prior to the committee acting.

Reid’s announcement came after numerous newspapers nationwide published editorials criticizing both his initial failure to disclose the full details of his Las Vegas land deal and his response to AP’s story.

The $1.1 million land deal was engineered by Jay Brown, a longtime friend and former casino lawyer whose name surfaced in a major political bribery trial this summer and in other prior organized crime investigations. Brown has never been charged with wrongdoing, except for a 1981 federal securities complaint that was settled out of court.

Ethics experts told AP that Reid’s inaccurate accounting of the deal to Congress appeared to violate Senate ethics rules and raised other issues concerning taxes and potential gifts.
 

Lieberman Urges Dems to Alter Their Ways

October 18, 2006

Oct 17, 3:09 PM (ET)

By JOHN CHRISTOFFERSEN
 
 
NEW HAVEN, Conn. (AP) – Sen. Joe Lieberman, running as an independent after losing the Democratic primary, said Tuesday he hoped Democrats seize control of Congress – with one caveat: a Democratic-led Congress, he said, must change its ways.

“It won’t represent progress that’s real,” Lieberman told reporters while stopping at a transportation forum in New Haven. “It’s not going to be much of a step forward if there’s a new Democratic leadership that doesn’t change the tone in Washington.”

As recently as Friday, Lieberman, a lifelong Democrat who was his party’s nominee for vice president in 2000, would not say whether he thinks the nation would be better off with the Democrats in control of Congress.

Democrats must gain 15 House seats and six Senate seats to win control of Congress. Lieberman has said he would remain a member of the Democratic caucus if he wins on Nov. 7.
Lieberman has said he will not endorse Democratic candidates because he understands that his candidacy has put Democratic candidates in an awkward position, and has said he would stay out of their races.

Most leading state and national Democrats have endorsed Ned Lamont, a wealthy cable television company executive who has put more than $8 million of his own money into the race. Republican Alan Schlesinger is also in the race, but trails in the polls.

Liz Dupont-Diehl, a spokeswoman for Lamont, said the three-term senator isn’t taking responsibility for helping set the tone in Washington. Lieberman has called for an end to partisan politics, but Lamont has criticized him for siding too often with Republicans and President Bush.

“It’s certainly hard to tell from Sen. Lieberman’s comments that he’s the incumbent,” she said. “It seems that he’s trying hard not to own up to the fact that he’s been there for 18 years.”

On Tuesday, Lamont faulted Lieberman for backing a 2005 energy bill that the Democratic candidate argues was a giveaway to big oil companies that sent gas prices soaring.

“That’s the Washington of George Bush and Joe Lieberman,” Lamont said in a speech at Eastern Connecticut State University. “That’s the Washington they have defended together.”

Lamont offered a plan to promote energy efficiency, alternative fuels and other renewable sources. He called for tax credits to help companies buy new fuel-efficent equipment and set a goal for the United States to use one quarter of its energy from renewable sources by 2025.

Lamont, the anti-war challenger, framed energy independence as a national security issue, “so we don’t have to fight and lose loved ones in a desert in Iraq thousands of miles away.”

Associated Press Writer Andrew Miga in Willimantic, Conn., contributed to this report.